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Wednesday, October 29, 2008

The maybe-flu and time with Jesus

I might have the flu. Been sick for many days now. Incapacitated. Feeling a little better, but also on meds I wasn't before, so I don't know if I'm actually getting better or just feeling better.

I am SO sick of this house. I've not been out of the house in a week, and that was the first time I'd been out of the house in probably a week, or maybe more.

The house is changing though. Or will be. My parents have bought a dishwasher and a stove. The dishwasher they're picking up tomorrow I think? Not sure about the stove?

I'm in that stage of being sick where if I sit still, I feel like I can take on the world. So I feel guilty about doing nothing and think of all these things to do... And then I move and remember "I'm SIIICKK". Darn it. Very irritating.

I've run out of books to read. My parents and I have been getting Joan of Arcadia and Dexter episodes from Joan of Arcadia. I finished watching all of them on Saturday. My parents haven't finished a single disk... and once they do it'll be two days before we get a new one... GRRRR...

So basically I'm idle and bored. And I don't like it. Plus I've been out of work for over a month now... I should be going back soon... but they've been saying that for weeks. If I'd known it'd be this long, maybe I would have looked for another job.

Maybe. I was job hunting 3 months before I found this one and I HATE job hunting.

But I am so broke. :( And idle and bored. I can think of lots of stuff to do.. and it all requires money. Reasonable amounts, true, but when you have no money, even ten dollars is too much.

I love God but I've been feeling distant from him lately. I set time aside with Him today and I will tomorrow and so on. I need to spend more time with him... I need fellowship though. I can feel myself slipping away. But I'm still dependent on parents for rides and my mom just doesn't think Bible study is worth the gas it takes to go there.

I was going to go with a friend to a masquerade ball, but then I found out that it was 20 dollars in advance, 25 the day of... I might have been able to talk my parents into five dollars (I assume I'll be well by Friday) but no more than that. So that's out. My young adult group from church is having a party tomorrow, but I don't know if I'll go since I'm sick. Maybe I'll wake up miraculously healed.

You'd think that the young adult group would count as fellowship, but it doesn't. It's a group of people who happen to be Christian, not a group seeking God together. Sigh. But my mom thinks if she takes me to that group, she doesn't have to take me to Bible study (since Bible study is twice the distance away). I want to go to both, but I'd take Bible study over the young adult group any day.

My dog, Sophie, has been the highlight of my day or night (she sleeps with me). I am so blessed to have her and she's a total gift from God. I just wanted to say that.

A friend of mine had a miscarriage over the weekend. Prayers requested.

I'm tired I know this blog entry is kind of... erratic. But... ah well.

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