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Friday, October 31, 2008

unquenching flow

I am so happy. I am so joyous. Song of my heart sing in resounding chorus, Loving you always, Lord of my soul, You are my portion, So I'm always full

Jesus, you give me amazing love all unending showering down
Jesus, you show me that you are enough hearts are mending all around
And I sing, with joy that amazes me
And I bring my lowly self for humility
Just to see you and be closer than before
Just to hold on to the faith that you restore

Jesus, I listen in rapture to birds that just capture everything
Jesus, I know I am falling again, I feel you well up within,
And You are amazing
Jesus! What more could I proclaim
I sing out your Holy Name
Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, Jesus
Jesus worth more than we can give
Worth more than we can live
Jesus, every searching heart declares
When you catch it unawares and show
The love that brings unquenching flow
Jesus.

I suppose an October 31 post is usually about Halloween.
I am joyous tonight, and I wanted to share the song of my heart.
I found out I might have diabetes. Crazy that that would lead to joy, right?
I'm changing my diet, exercising more... I called a dear friend, a beloved sister in Christ, for comfort. She lives a time zone over and is a bit of night owl, so I thought she'd be available at 11:37 my time. She was.

She listened. She comforted. She's wonderful at that. We talked about the upcoming election.
Then I talked about how I've been feeling like I'm losing the Christian battle between the selfish-self and who I truly am in Christ. And she talked about her progress too...

And when she was talking I felt this pull to talk to her about God Calling, the book I have quoted many times in this blog. And she felt, when I was telling her about it, that it sounded exactly like what she needed. Her relationship is very strong with God right now, but she felt she needed something to help her keep progressing, instead of just treading spiritual water.

We discussed its contents and we got to the topic of a friend of ours. And we started talking about approaching a concern a different way, a different angle of prayer...

And we were both electrified.

I had what I was missing tonight. I had a dynamic, amazing fellowship tonight. We're going to talk again next week. Talk about the election, and about God Calling, and something else; who knows?
But I feel a little bit more alive tonight.

And I feel joyous! I feel God. I feel... peaceful. And like dancing. At the same time. My bridegroom awaits!

Isn't that crazy when you think just a few hours ago I was frightened at the idea of this disease? I was trying not to be, but I was. I was sad and upset and confused...

And now it just all makes sense, life is good, and most of all, God is good. I am so in love with God.

Tonight was one of those nights that is supposed to happen.

Alleluia!

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