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Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Lonely.

It's smokey outside. Some neighbor is burning something illegally. We're not sure if it's a bonfire or if they're burning garbage.
I can't stand when people burn garbage.
The scent is somewhere in between wood smoke and chemical smoke. It's seeped into the house.

I started feeling sick around 3. My mom and dad are sick. My best friend and her husband and his friend. And my sister. Everyone is sick and I'm starting to feel sick.

I want to visit my friend with a coma, but if I'm sick I can't.
I guess being ill has made me less chipper. The smoke might have helped too.
I instead feel sort of... flat.

A girl from Converse called today. Telethon I think they call it. I did it for one month. Asking for money. I don't have any, but I told her to try back later. I always promised I'd donate at least something... but I really don't have any money. She said they'll call again in the spring. Hopefully by then I'll have money.

Let's go dancing. Or something. I feel... quietly restless. I miss people. Of course, I tend to, living here in the middle of nowhere. But my mom hasn't been leaving her room except to smoke or eat and then she scurries back there. And my dad's been out, at work mainly. So I've been extra alone. No one even watches tv with me in the evening, which has been my primary social interaction lately.

I'm lonely.

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