Sometimes I torture myself pleasantly.
What I mean is, I look at things online and dream. Like stuff about weddings, or apartments, or houses. Or things about babies or adoption or homescholing. Stuff of my dreams. Someday stuff.
I am currently looking at children in the foster care system awaiting adoption. My heart aches for them. The website I'm reading says "Did you know it would take less than one percent of the U.S. population to provide a forever family for every child in foster care available for adoption?" At some point in my life, I'd love to adopt some of those children. I'm not in a position to do so now, obviously. But someday. Adoption is one of those things that I've introduced Ryan to (he'd just never really thought about it before he met me) but which he thinks is an awesome idea.
So I'll let you in on my thoughts. I'm hoping to have one or two birth kids (but who knows?), then one kid adopted from India, then a sibling group from foster care... but who knows? It's all just fun fantasy right now. I play with my thoughts and dreams, torture myself pleasantly a little, but know I really have very little say in how it turns out. God's got a plan. Oh, and maybe when all my kids are teenagers and the oldest start moving out... I go and adopt some of the older foster kids. So maybe I'll end up having a pretty big family. But maybe I just end up having one or two kids... or none at all. Though that's a really sad thought.
I also have learned I have a penchant for some art deco jewelry. Who knew?