I've eluded to something going on in my life that I wasn't sharing. I told myself last week that good or bad, I think I would share after yesterday. Yesterday I went to the doctor.
Sometimes it's hard to put things out there. I am struggling to share this with you because my instinct is to keep it for myself and a few in my 'inner circle'. But while I was debating if I should write this post or not, I went and read some of the blogs I follow and read this post. And I realized I had to share. So, my Lord Jesus, please take these words and make them relevant in the way you mean, and guide my typity fingers.
I've been bleeding non-stop for over 18 months. You know, as a woman. I have polycystic ovarian syndrome, which is a hormone disorder, so while this is not a common symptom of PCOS when I looked up prolonged bleeding (over a year ago) top of the list was hormone imbalances. So I didn't worry...
Though when I confided in one of my closest friends she freaked out and told me that her aunt had had that and it was cancer. But when I looked it the bleeding symptom online, cancer wasn't even on the list of the top ten things it could be... so I didn't worry.
Since I graduated, I haven't had health insurance. So I didn't go to the doctor. Thanks to Obama's bill, I got health insurance for the first time in there years starting June 1st. So last month, I went to the OB-GYN to get it checked out. He put me on pills, which should stop the bleeding, and told me to schedule an appointment in a few weeks to do an ultrasound, just to make sure it was nothing serious, but it was probably just the PCOS. There was a small chance of endometrial cancer, but it would be rare in someone my age, and if the ultrasound was normal, that would rule it out. If it wasn't, they'd do further tests.
I was relieved, because from what I'd read online either they'd give you a pill or want to do a D&C starting off, which he did mention as a possibility for the future, but I figured if he wanted to try a pill first, he must think it's not too big a deal.
So after the visit, I wasn't upset at all. Then a week and a half later, a friend of mine who I'd told about the bleeding and appointment but not the results asked me online. And I told her what I'd told others right after... but as I typed 'small chance of cancer' it really hit me.
There was a chance I had cancer.
I sat there for a minute, and I decided to go look up the type of cancer he'd mentioned. What I found alarmed me.
First of all, I didn't only have the one symptom (the bleeding). I had a few. In addition, the website I was looking at told me even in stage one they would take your uterus (and probably want to take your ovaries too).
And the pills weren't working yet. I was still bleeding...