Discipline-ing-ness... Yeah...

Life has been about disciplining myself lately. Part of the discipline has actually been blogging. I've been aiming for a post a day. I'm not beating myself up when I miss a day, but I try to make up for it (without blogging ten times one day, cause that'd probably drive y'all nuts!) Yes, I said y'all. I'm somewhat southern now. Sigh.

Anyway, discipline! Right. The subject on hand. Hmm. What was my point?

Ah yes, that I'm not particularly disciplined in general.  I'm a start lots of stuff, finish few kind of person. A haphazard, scatterbrained type of girl. I've got an absent minded professor kind of personality. No one doubts my intelligence, just my ability to focus and hunker down.  And I lose stuff. And I'm clumsy. Though I'm not sure clumsiness really has anything to do with discipline, I'm just throwing it out there.

So God and I have been trying to work on that.  Some efforts have been more successful than others. For example, this is my 30th post for the month of June, on the 30th of June. Awesome. Also, this also happens to be my 100th post for the year! Also very cool.  I only started my once a day blogging-ness towards the end of April. It's been great. Not only has God been blessing my blogging efforts, but also it's just helping me be a better writing. Writing is my love. It's not my only love, but it's been a life long one, well since I learned to write.  Writing is something I will do all my life. And now I've been getting writing practice daily. True, I'm more a novelist, but this is also really awesome. I have fallen in love with blogging.

I also am doing a 'Summer Bible Reading Challenge' where I'm supposed to read 3 chapters (certain selections) a day, every day. And if I read at least one of verse from it, that also counts, because the discipline of daily reading counts for more than how much, though how much is also good.  Anyway, I've been doing that. I've missed many days, but I've mainly done it. And it's not how often you fall down but how often you get up, you know?  So that counts too.

And I've been doing it with exercise, as you know, with the Couch to 5K program. In addition to the three exercises per week for that, I've also been trying to get in plenty of other exercises weekly, to bring my body to a healthier place and discipline it and master it.

I keep coming across other things I could do, such as other exercise programs, or Bible reading plans, or whatnot. And I've tried a few other things, like Ryan and I were going to read a book together, but that was a disaster (I wanted to do many days readings at a time, he kept skipping days). We've decided to restart, but we've not picked when yet. I'm trying not to overwhelm myself. Because I suck at this discipline thing, usually. So it's more important to me to keep the balls I'm already juggling in the air than to add anymore.

There are probably people out there laughing at me. They think 'what balls? You're barely doing anything.' To them I sheepishly smile and shrug. I am sooo not a regular, scheduled person. I am flexible. I am freewheeling chaos. And I love it.  That's how God designed me, it's my strength. I can handle the unexpected. I am up for adventures at 3 am or 3pm. Crises usually don't phase me, but paperwork makes me break into a sweat.  I can have a 7 hour heart to heart with someone I've met once, but I hate calling to get pizza delivered.

But God also wants me to be strong in a more normal way.  To be able to handle the expected and the daily grind. And it is sooooo hard for me.  And I'm trying.  There is nothing I hate more than letting people down, but I seem to do it a lot. And I want to try to juggle things more. To clean house more often. To turn in paperwork on time. To wake up in the morning and fall asleep at night. These things are so hard for me.

I know I'm weird.

But in the discipline of blogging, I'm trying to learn to walk the line between authenticity and over sharing. I'm not sure what I've learned, but I've been asking God to teach me about real authenticity, which is something he calls all saints to try. So that's what I'm trying to do here. To show you who I am, what I struggle with, while at the same time defusing the situation a little bit with humor like this:

Just so I won't get too serious. :)

Oh yeah, adding photos to blog posts? That's another discipline I need to work on. I'll get good at it for a while... and then I fade away again. It's mainly because of the dial up, but it's also because I forget to take pictures of stuff a lot.

Forgive me?

Forgiveness

Yesterday I opened the facebook page of a girl who had wronged me a long time ago...

She'd come up in conversations with friends in the last couple weeks, and I realized I hadn't forgiven her. I had thought I had: in college I remember intense times in prayer with God trying to forgive everyone in my past. I thought I had.  But it's not forgiveness if you still dwell on the wrong doing, if the first thing you think of is the transgressions when that person comes to mind. Except in a situation where the only thing you know of the person is the transgression, for example, a clerk at a bank who messed up your account and you'd never met before. Obviously, if you ran into that person at the grocery store, that's what you'd think of because it's your only frame of reference.. but in that case, there should be no anger or other negative emotions when you think of it if you've really forgiven them.  

I realized that forgiveness wasn't in me when I thought of her, because of the clenching in my gut. And God says this about forgiveness:

"If you have anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven will also forgive you your wrongdoing. But if you don't forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your wrongdoing."

Mark 11:25-26

Forgiveness is essential to the Christian faith, and I felt shame that I'd not forgive her already. It was pride, but I thought I had forgiven those in my past.  I am glad Jesus brought this to my attention. I prayed the other day to forgive her, and it was put out of my mind for the moment...

Then last night, she came to mind so I looked her up on facebook. I saw pictures of her with her husband, and I found myself smiling. I looked at her face, which is precious to the Lord, and felt warmth.  As I wrote this, something wanted me to dwell again on transgressions that were forgiven, but now I call to mind the person she is, not my narrow impression of her from our past, and I forgive. And I feel love for her, and freedom.

That's forgiveness. And it is so good.

In Praise of Highspeed

Ohhh, it is SO nice to have access to highspeed internet! Right now I am listening to music from Pandora.  I've gotten to chat on webcam with Ryan... more than once! People post videos on their blogs or facebook and I don't just have to gather from context clues what it is, I can actually watch it!!!!

Just marveling at the wonders. :)  I thank God for the internet, that I can access it at all at home even if it is slow, and that I get a few days of this happiness.  Maybe someday He'll let me have it at my home, wherever that might be.

Couch to 5K: Week One

This has been a crazy week, and it's only week one!


The workout for the week was:
5 minutes warm up walk, 60 seconds jogging, 90 seconds walking, repeat last two steps until 20 minutes. Stretch.


Day One:
Wednesday, June 22


I got out there, and I did it! I felt spent and plastered with sweat, but good.  I was excited to be doing it.


That evening, Erika invited me out to her gym. I could visit one time for free, so this was i.  As I was running about to get ready, I had stuck my feet in my shoes but not all the way. As I walked through the laundry room, my ankle twisted really fast. It hurt, but as soon as I righted my foot, it stopped. I forgot about it, and went and worked out at the gym, doing the recumbant bike, treadmill, eliptical, and a variety of weight machines (my pecs hurt for days because I don't think I ever work them out!)


Day Two:
Friday, June 24

Halfway through my right foot starting hurting from a plantar fasciitis flare.  I have it, as does everyone in my family. My impulse was to keep going, but then I thought and actually said outloud "You're supposed to stop if it hurts." So I stopped by the side of the road and tightened my laces, then got up and started again. I was upset with myself for interrupting my workout, I hadn't done that before... but then after only 35 seconds, it started hurting again!

So I stopped. Because it's way too early to injure myself by keep going!  When my plantar fasciitis flares, the only way to make it stop is rest.. but I decided to try again Saturday morning, and that time make sure my laces are extra tight.

That evening, Erika and I went to clean my friend Suzanne's pool. She hosts Bible Study. After we cleaned it, we swam in it for about an hour before Bible Study started. During Bible Study, I realized my right ankle was hurting a little..

Saturday, June 25


I told myself I was going to do it, got my shoes on, and was looking for my water bottle... when I realized my foot already hurt. From just looking for my water bottle. It seemed to be my ankle this time, and I remembered Wednesday. This really depressed me, so I discussed it with my mom, who advised me to ice it, take ibuprofen, and rest for two days. I thought 'if it's been so many days since I did the first day, I'll have to start this week over." But I did it, because as I said, I don't want to get a real injury that makes it so I can't do the program at all.. but it's the first week! Very annoying for something to come up so fast.


Sunday, June 26


I thought I was just going to rest. I'd already resigned myself to the idea I was going to repeat the entire week...  but then that afternoon, I was restless. And my foot didn't hurt.. so I had to do it! So I did. :) Very slowly, but I did it. Because I was active Friday, and except for my foot hurting a tiny bit, the workout did seem easier to manage than Wednesdays (cardio vascular wise) I felt I could totally call this Week One Day Two, and didn't have to repeat at all!


Day Three:
Tuesday, June 28


I arrived at my sister's apartment in Florence at 3am. I didn't fall asleep until quite after 4am. So it was no surprise I didn't wake until 10:30 in the morning. Which is not horribly late, but it's too hot to workout in South Carolina late June at that time. Especially since it takes a while for me to wake up.


So I decided not to do my workout until after the sun had gone down. Meanwhile, one of my sister's friends came over and the three of us hit the pool, where we stayed for probably an hour. We were then hungry, and went out for pizza. After some window shopping, we got groceries, and by the time we got home it was close to ten. I talked to Ryan before he left for work (he wakes up around 9:30 pm our time) and went and did my workout at 11:20pm...


And did it! Unfortunately, my shoes were acting up. I put double socks on the right side, in an effort to stabilize it.  It worked... but my left foot wiggled. Then, three quarters of the way through the exercise, it felt like my right foot was like really tight. Like the blood supply wasn't great. I think maybe it has swollen up a little and with two socks and a tightly tied shoe.. so I sat down for a second and was going to loosen it, but decided to just kick the shoes off for now, and finished the last 5 minutes in my socks.




So that was my week. Not the smoothest, but it got done. I'll be here, at my sister's, for the first day of week two, so I'll run in these shoes again. But I'm thinking about when I get home digging out my last pair of sneakers and seeing if they'd work better. But I'm not sure it's the shoes, it might just be my feet. I can't run barefoot normally (though people recommend that) because of my plantar fasciitis. But I can walk all day and it doesn't flare. Somehow it's getting aggravated fast with this walk/jogging. So I should be able to fix that somehow. I don't have the money for new shoes or arch supports though, so I'm hoping I can find a solution apart from that.  But the truth is, I am over a hundred pounds overweight. It's quite possible this is just my feet saying 'hey! That's a lot of weight slamming down on me' and my response has to just be 'suck it up, because this is how we'll lower that amount.'  Well, to be honest, that's not as convincing as 'We've made a commitment to this! So too bad, silly foot!' :)

I Won a Book!

Yay! I am so excited! You may have noticed that on my last post I got a comment from someone telling me I won a book! That someone, Kimberly, is the author of a blog I subscribe to A Planting of the Lord. And she held a contest a few days ago, where she had reviewed the book A Confident Heart: How to Stop Doubting Yourself & Live in the Security of God's Promises by Renee Swope and was giving it away. So I entered. And apparently I won!


I really do struggle with lots of insecurities. So I totally think my winning is God's work. And I will definitely do my own review of it as well. 


So thank you Kimberly, and thank you God!

Impromptu Travel Plans

I'm going to visit my sister in Florence! I leave tonight!

This just happened, basically. Alison came over today, having finished helping her fiance move over the weekend. And she's moving herself at the end of July.  My parents are coming down to help her mid-July. She's moving home from college. She's working right now, and she's trying to get motivated to pack...

And has decided that motivation is me. I'll be an extra set of hands and company as she packs. And I'm okay with that. I'm not usually this impulsive... but she has high speed internet and her apartment complex has a pool. Plus, she's my sister. So it should be fun! I should be back Friday or Saturday.

Edit: I will still be blogging. So I'll be back home Friday or Saturday, but I should be back on here tomorrow. :)

Quick Update!

I haven't been online in a few days.

My grandfather had emergency surgery Friday. I'd appreciate prayers. He's recovering fine, but he's still in the hospital and prayers are very good things. He's in New Jersey, so I didn't go up or anything, but the phone has been commandeered by family members called and being called.

Also, my younger sister and older sister have both been traveling and whatnot. So the phone has been tied up, and since we have dial up, our phone is our internet.

Today is my cousin Matthias's wedding too. I really, really wish I was there, but alas it's in Kansas City and I don't have the traveling funds. If you guys end up reading this, God bless you and your marriage! I love you so, and really wanted to see the family...

My Morning Fright

I went to bed early last night. So I get up this morning, and listen to music in my bed.  Then I stumble around, because today was a morning I was to do the C25K training. My stomach told me I'd been up too long without breakfast, so I finally get up and shuffle out to the living room, turn on the light and yell a small "Ahh!"

What was it that made me yell? Was it a spider? A severed head? A cat tap dancing? No. It was...

My younger sister Alison, sleeping on the couch!

She's actually leaving as I write this. She's meeting up with her future in-laws, then they're all going down to Florida to help her fiance move apartments.  I hadn't known she was coming, and she arrived after I went to bed last night.

So I spent the morning visiting with her, for the most part. She'll be coming back Sunday evening, which is good because we'll be celebrating my mom's birthday. Today is actually Mom's birthday (and my older sister's five year wedding anniversary... where has the time gone??) but Dad's working and Fridays are Bible Study for me, so we're going to celebrate Sunday.  And now Ali will join us!

Yo, Twig Warriors!

Ryan and I have many parallels in our past. That we were meant for each other neither of us doubts.  One similarity is we were both involved in long term, international engagements with someone who we ultimately found out had lied and cheated on us.

The difference was when I found out about it, I had been leaning on God for a while already and His comfort and love flooded me and carried me through the storm in a sturdy vessel. In contrast, what happened with Ryan’s fiancée ultimately ended up with him turning his heart towards the Lord more than before.  The difference between them is the difference between us each burning ourselves in an equally painful way, but I immediately run cold water over my burn until it stops hurting and he tries to tough it out until he can’t take anymore and then sought treatment. The healing times between those two burns don’t even compare.  So even though my betrayal was actually more recent, his is still healing. But it is healing.

Because of that, Ryan is a little clingy and has a few other behaviors that are layovers from his former relationship. He had greatly healed before we met, but for both of us, this is the first (and last) significant relationship since that betrayal took place. So there are sore spots being revealed through these new experiences we didn’t know were there before. And we’re working through them, and Ryan will be fine…

But that’s not actually the point. The point of this story is while life is tough for everyone, it is so much better with the Lord.  If Ryan hadn’t turned to Him when He did, he’ll tell you himself that he’d be far worse off.  And I can’t imagine having faced that storm without Him. We need Him.  Living life without God is like facing an army of tanks and machine guns armed only with a twig. Living life with Him is like facing that same army but now you’ve got in an invisible space-age armor with lasers and photon torpedoes and ten thousand by your side.  And your mission is to support your fellow space shippers… and save the twig warriors.

So this me getting on my sci-fi loud speaker and saying, “Hey, if you feel overwhelmed by life, facing the enemy with your twig, throw your twig down (what good is it doing anyway?) and come sign up with our commander. We’d love you on our side. It’s still war, but it is so much better over here! 

“I know you thought me and my brothers in arms were crazy when we threw down our sticks. I know it appears to you that we're walking around without any armor or weapons. And I know you don’t believe in our commander because you’ve never seen him. But once you take the step to join up, He’ll meet you right where you are. I know you don’t think I really have invisible armor, and my battle history is spotty because I’m still learning how to use it, but I have had visible victories and we all get ongoing training.

“Think about it. And we love you over here. We can’t save everyone who is facing the enemy armed with twigs… but we want to! All you have to do is throw down your twig and join up.  I know all too often it’s hard to throw that twig down, as it seems the only thing between you and the oncoming forces, but our commander just wants you, not your twig… and if you set it aside, He’ll arm you with invisible weapons more powerful than anything the enemy has, I promise. And even better, He promises.  Join Us.”

So that’s my call to action. If you want to know more, email me. I love you.

Boring, Daily, Rural Life

I woke up this morning at 5:30 am because I could hear my dad's alarm going off.  But that was okay. I'm a sound sleeper, so usually if a faint noise wakes me it's because my body is okay with being awoken. I stayed in bed and listened to dance type music for another half an hour before I actually got up...

Today was the day I actually did the first day of the Couch to 5K program! But more about that with my weekly update next week.

Yesterday I went to the doctor's. It went about how I'd hoped/expected.  Chances are it's nothing serious, I have gotten a treatment we expect will work... but I'm going back on July 19 for a test that will make sure it's not serious because there's still a tiny chance that it is. Your prayers were, and are, appreciated.

Ryan completed day two of five of exams. He thinks he's done well so far. I'm still praying for him, and would love if you would too.

I actually wrote a pretty good post for this blog last night... but I wrote it on my netbook (which only gets online at wifi hotspots. At home, I can only get online on my mom's laptop) and I've not transferred it onto a flash drive or anything. But I'll get it to you in due time.

Speaking of due time, the paperwork for visiting Ryan isn't going anywhere.  But that's primarily my fault.  But we're figuring it out, and trusting that the delays are evidence of God's timing, not just us being stupid.

I'm hoping to do something with Erika this afternoon, but I don't know if it will happen or not.  Other than that, not a lot is actually going on in my world.  The name of the game lately has been discipline... but you know what? That sounds like it'd be a really good post by itself so instead of writing about it now, I might wait for its due time and tell you all about it.

I love and appreciate you all. I hope I'm not boring any of you, just telling you about my boring, daily, rural life. In fact, I can't even spice this up with pictures because I use my parent's camera and my mom has it, I think. I'm sure your lives are so much more exciting.. in fact, is there anything any of you want to share? I love comments!

A Few Requests

Today a few things are going on.  For one, Ryan has completed two of ten exams. Please pray for him as he starts again tonight (his morning). 

And this afternoon, I am going to the doctor for the first time in three years. I just got health insurance again, for the first time since graduating college. I've been having a health concern for over a year now but haven't had the money to go to a doctor. Please pray for me, and for it, and that it's nothing serious. I think it's just related to the PCOS that I know I have... but I don't know for sure, so just say a prayer for me?

And my friend Hannah, who is starting the 5K I am going to run in, is calling for volunteers to help that day. So if you live in the upstate of South Carolina and want to help on September 10th, then go over to her blog and contact her.

And while I'm asking things of you, please go and vote for the blog "Storing Up Treasures" in this contest, which ends today at 5pm. It's a great blog. Though I admit, I've been reading some of the other blogs, including the one currently in first, and it's a great blog too... but the blog I'm asking you to vote for is the one that led me to the others, so it's the best. :-P

I have a sleeping disorder

I have a sleeping disorder. It's not a matter of will power or choice, it's a disease.  No one gets angry at an epileptic for having seizures, so why are people angry at me for not being able to control my sleeping habits?

I have shed so many tears over this, some tonight.  I have pleaded and begged myself, on my knees, crying before bed telling myself I had to go to a class in the morning for a test or something... only to oversleep and wake up and weep and wail. I have seen it cause people to lose respect for me, it's cost me opportunities, and I have let countless amount of people down.

Please understand, people. This is not my choice. It is my disease. You may be a victim, but I am its primary victim.

Of course, this doesn't apply to most of you, maybe even all of you. The person who prompted this doesn't even read my blog. But I am upset, and I thought I'd throw this out here. And add that if you know someone with a sleeping disorder, don't get angry at them for something they can't control. I don't know how many nights I've been scared to sleep because I didn't know if I'd wake up in time for something important, or how many nights I've lain in bed for hours upon hours without sleep overtaking me.

It is not a matter of will power or priorities. It really isn't. Have patience with me. Please.

And I am sorry for everyone I have let down through the years because of this. You will never know how sorry.

My Pre-Couch to 5K Workouts

I did it!! I finished!! And now I can begin.

When I went and looked at the Couch to 5K program, I thought "while this looks slow and easy in general... I'm not quite to the place where I can start week one". It starts out pretty slow for most people... but while I can walk all day, I can't jog or run at all without huffing.  And the first week has you jogging for a minute, walking for only ninety seconds, then doing it again.

I thought, "this is for people who aren't fit. Which is you... but you're not fit and you're overweight. It encourages you to ease into it and take it slow. So why don't you do that? Take three weeks to work out in a slower way and build up to the first week of the Couch to 5K program. That way you don't get injured or burn out. And that'll still give you a two week cushion for the regular program if you need to slow down at any point."

So I did that. If you think I'm a little pathetic... that's okay.


Week One: 

5 minutes of  my regular pace walking (dynamic stretching) then two minutes of my regular pace walking, then one minute of brisk walking. Repeat for total of 20 minutes, three times a week.

I am really, really slow. Ask any of my friends. I can walk all day, but at a very slow pace.  So the Couch to 5K's first week has you alternating between 'a brisk walk' and jogging, so I know it sounds lame, but I thought it'd ease me into 'brisk walking' and, moreover, it'd get me in the habit of working out without being that hard or daunting.  Because stick-to-it-iveness is not my strong suit.

It was very easy, and towards the end I was thinking I'd just do one more 'preCouch to 5K' weeks instead of two...

Week Two:

5 minutes of walking at whatever pace felt right (dynamic stretching), then one minute of regular walking, two minutes brisk walking, one minute jogging, three minutes regular walking, two minutes brisk walking, as close to a minute of jogging as I could get, then repeat the last three steps for a total of 20 minutes, three times a week.

So I started this week thinking it'd be my last prep week, however...

I was totally pathetic at the jogging. I couldn't do a full minute without huffing.  It was sort of depressing.
But I still felt encouraged! Because I can do this!

By the way, the heat didn't help. This was during the heat wave. Even in the morning, it was too hot, and I wasn't able to do it in the morning everyday. If I had a treadmill, I'd probably have been able to job better. I think. (Shh. If I've got illusions, don't tell me).

BUT at the end of the week, I was feeling better. And while I still wasn't good at jogging I didn't feel quite as wiped at the end. So there you go.

It's crazy that I can walk all day or dance for an hour without feeling exhausted, but I can't jog for two minutes? Seriously, what is that?

But at the end of week two, I still felt excited to be doing this! Just a little humbled...

Week Three:

Day One and Two: 
5 minutes brisk walking.  Stretches.  Two minutes brisk walking. One minute jogging. One minute slow walking. Repeat last three steps.  Stretches. 


Day Three: 
5 minutes brisk walking.  Stretches. Two minutes brisk walking. One minute jogging. One minute slow walking. One minute brisk walking. Repeat last three steps. Stretches.  (well, actually, I skipped the first stretches)


This week was filled with highlight, lowlights, and humor. So I shall in the every versatile format of a bulleted list:

• I somewhat found a stride during jogging! Sort of! Yay!
• I learned getting really absent minded and singing under your breath as you job makes jogging harder because you need to breathe. Duh.
• And even though I don't have an MP3 player, I'm totally capable of hearing music in my head.
• Stretching is very important, especially after your workout.
• I happened to be in a jogging minute when a group of cyclists past me saying 'hi' and 'good morning' and I waved and said 'good morning everyone!' I felt like one of the cool, active people and it was fun.
• I forgot sunblock once...
• and to not lock myself out of the house...
• and to do my pre-workout stretches inside, so that when I accidentally locked myself outside I didn't have to do them on the soaking wet from night storms ground. Oh, yeah. But I did them anyway! Aren't you proud of me?
• I saw a rusty knife and an empty beer bottle together on the side of the road and thought, "Gosh I hope they weren't used together."
• I also forgot to completely fill my water bottle, because I totally drained it before I was done working out.
• And you know what? I should take allergy medicine if I'm going run outside.
• And one day I forgot deodorant.  Yes, seriously. Thank God for showers!
• I learned to avoid a certain side street... or I might be followed by an unfriendly, annoying yellow dog.
• I was feeling drained as I jogged one minute and I thought of Sadie Mae and felt a burst of energy.
• I forgot to use the bathroom before I left home and didn't feel the urge until I was a 1/2 mile from home... making the return jogging very uncomfortable.
• I need to make sure that I tie my shoes equally tight, or the looser foot hurts.
• Talking to Jesus in my head makes it so much better!

Aside from this stuff, I also went walking with Tabitha twice, danced for over an hour at a wedding, went swimming twice, walked my dog for a mile, did a few minutes on a stationary bike, and walked myself for a mile once.

I begin the Couch to 5K program, the normal 9 week program, on Wednesday.  There's 11 weeks until the Field of Sunflowers Walk/Run.  Not too late to join me!

Living Room Adventures

Sometimes blog posts build up throughout the day and are ready to be poured out by the time I get to the computer.  Sometimes, like this time, there's thoughts I have but they're not yet concise, not yet defined, not yet whole.

Yet, I want to share the thoughts, at least, of the process.  Yesterday I went to church with my friend Erika, two services in fact. We went again to NewSpring, where she attends, and then to the church which her father pastors, since it's Father's Day.  Both sermons fit together well, and were showing me things.

How those things will be applied, I am not yet sure, except to focus more on the here and now, while still never taking eyes off the promises and plans God has for me (not I have for myself).  The here and now? I'm not really excited about that.  There are elements that excite me: connecting with friends, training for the Field of Sunflowers Walk/Run, and so on... but what God was making me focus on in the here and now was cleaning the living room, doing the dishes, and listening.  Not exciting stuff.

Indeed, it was mixed.  Friday night we talked about missionaries at Bible Study.  Missionary? I'm not saying I'm called to that, per se, but all Christians are called to shine Christ's light where they are, and soon I hope to be in India, not just for the visit Ryan and I are working towards for the fall, but to live, with Ryan as my spouse.  My path has been shaped recently towards molding my mind and heart towards India.  I have seen the signs along this road pointing the way, and I have some indication where I'm going...

So my heart has been ahead, where God has been setting my mind, but now He's trying to call me back, back to here. Back to the present moment. And there's a deepness to that, a solemn weight, an indescribable weight. I really can't figure out how to express it to you.  But it is serious, but calm, unfettered, and joyful... still not putting right...

The books and movies I've seen lately are on a theme. A theme I am not prepared to share. At the churches on Sunday, there was this sense of excitement, of running for adventure, of following God as Abraham did, not knowing where he was going, yet he left all he knew and went.  It stirred with me this sense of yeah, let's go!

Not knowing where he was going was the key phrase... and the adventure God highlighted to me?

Cleaning the living room.

I don't understand.  But I am having faith, and listening, and loving... pray for me. And for Ryan.

Oh, please pray for my Ryan. He's taking huge, huge exams for the rest of the week (he's in college).  First one tomorrow... well late tonight, with the time difference.

I am about to finish my pre-Couch to 5K program.  I love you, readers!

Happy Father's Day, Everyone!

So today we celebrate Dads! 

Dad holding newborn me in the hospital (the cute toddler is my older sister Beth)

I love my Dad.  And I know he loves me. He's a good man. He's a hard-working, patient, and intelligent.  He's definitely in love with my mom, to whom he's been married for over 30 years.  He's a genuine hero, because he's been a volunteer firefighter for 16 or 17 years now.  He amazes me (and everyone) with his stamina.

Mom and Dad at their wedding

God gave us a miracle a few years ago when Dad was hit head on by a drunk driver.  I thank God he survived. He gave me his hair, a love of sci-fi science fiction, an appreciation of blueberries and potato salad, and his own particular brand of humor. He adores animals, reading, and his family.

My family. Younger sister Alison, Mom, Me, Dad, and older sister Beth at my graduation.

Dad grew up without a dad of his own, because my grandfather died when he was only 18 months old.  He's done great, forging ahead with little example, but being a positive example in the lives of my sisters and I.

Dad as a boy.

And he's probably never going to read this because one of his quirks is he never comes online. Seriously, it's been probably a year.  Even though he adores technology and gadgets of all sorts! 

In case you ever do, I love you, Dad. Happy Father's Day! To you, and to everyone. We all had a Father, some of us more than one. And I'm not talking about our earthly fathers alone.


"Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ." -1 Corinthians 1:3

How I Came to Running

So in my last post I announced that I'm going to be running in a 5K in September, which is a big deal to me because it's for an excellent cause, honoring the memory of my friend's daughter, helping families who are struggling with fatal diagnosis for their unborn babies, and helping fund adoptions. And because I'm over a hundred pounds overweight. I am SO excited.

So I told you I'd tell you more about how I came to this decision. 

Since I graduated I have flirted with fitness. I'd get on a good exercise regiment... and it'd go all to pot. Tabby and I were exercising at least twice a month and encouraging each other to work out on our own. We were work out buddies... until she got pregnant.

I really wanted to get on the Appalachian Trail and thru-hike, but it wasn't God's plan for me this year. I'd be out there for six months, hiking daily (with some zero days, of course) and it sounds wonderful. I'd love to do it at some point.  And not just for fitness, though that's totally a high up reason. But I love the cool people, the channeling of my wanderlust, the adventure, the nature... anyway. 

So after the AT went bust (money and timing) I did sit up straight when I saw commercials for the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer and the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure. I love to walk. Like love it. Just going walking with friends is my idea of a great day.  I can walk all day.

But it didn't seem right. I mean, there wasn't one nearby, but also after praying for it... I can't relate to breast cancer. I just don't know anyone who has it.  If someone asked me 'why are you doing this?' unless I lied the answer would be something like 'Because I want to walk for fitness. And oh yeah, breast cancer should be cured.' I don't know. Like I said, I prayed and it didn't seem right. But I did pray to God that if he'd show me a charity walk or walk/run that he wanted me to be in, to let me know. Either to change my passion for like the breast cancer ones, or maybe show me one I could be passionate about.

I've loved and prayed and cried with Hannah all through her journey with Sadie Mae... and well before. And with my PCOS and being overweight, problems with pregnancy cut even closer to home. If I get the joy of pregnancy someday, I know I'd be higher risk for things to go wrong.

PCOS, a common hormone disorder that I and one in twenty women have, is the leading cause of infertility. Actually, when my doctor diagnosed me at 16 (though I'm positive I've had since I was 12) he told me I could very well become infertile. I got frightened and he and my mom asked why. I told them I wanted children someday. I hadn't even realized how much until he said it might not happen. He tried to soothe me and told me that I'd probably be fertile until I was at least 25.

I'm 25. And unmarried and never have done anything to become pregnant. This birthday hit me hard.  I really wanted to be married and have at least one child by 25.

God introduced me to Ryan when I was 24... but with less than 9 months to go, even if we were crazy and impulsive and not on opposite sides of the globe without the money to get together.  God's timing is purposeful, and my hope is He'll prove doctors wrong and wanted to make sure I didn't have a kid before twenty five so He show the world.  And I will definitely give Him all the credit! I know who open and closes wombs.

That said, I want to adopt. I have a huge passion for adoption and have told Ryan that I'd be more disappointed if I didn't have adopted kids than if I didn't have biological children. Now I'm in a more longing for a biological phase, I think because so many of my friends have had babies or are having them and I'm watching the pregnancy journey. But regardless, I want to do both. 

The best advice doctors give patients with PCOS to manage it is losing weight. But weight loss is actually made harder for women with PCOS than for the general public, and the PCOS usually causes the weight gain in the first place. It did for me.

March 15, I weighed myself and I won't tell you how much I weighed, but it was wayyy too much. I freaked out. Then I did the math. And I realized if I could lose a certain amount in a year, which was a doable amount, I'd be in a better place. Then if I did the same thing again the next year, I'd be smaller than I've ever been at my adult height. Then if I went one more year, I could lose ten pounds less than that number and be a normal weight! It didn't seem overwhelming. I could try...

But after a few weeks, my drive faded. I didn't have anyone doing it with me, or encouraging me, or caring.  And it was hard to find the time to exercise, and I have no control over my diet.

Well, not NO control. I can choose what to put in my mouth or plate, but I don't do the grocery shopping. I never have. I went from living with my parents to eating at a cafeteria to living with my parents. I cook my own breakfast and lunches, but we all eat the same dinner. And since I'm the only one who eats lunch in my family, they usually just get me the same thing for the whole week (like grilled cheese or eggs or whatnot).  If it's not healthy that week, there's often not another choice. And my will power is not great. If there's brownies on the counter, I might be able to resist for an hour... maybe a day. But I will give in.

The only way for me not to indulge is to only keep healthy food around me. And while Mom and Dad are willing to buy a few healthy options for me, they're not willing to not buy bags of M&Ms or potato chips if they want them just because I can't resist. Which I totally understand. My parents aren't horribly bad with food, it's just they're not the ones with the problem and it's not fair to make them change just for me. But when I looked up optimum diets for people PCOS... what we eat in this house is not it.

So while I can try to eat healthy, I'm limited in my efforts.

So a little before Tabitha's baby Jordan turned two months, she and I started exercising together again. I got my workout buddy back! And she is eager to lose the baby weight. Plus she wasn't that happy with her weight when she originally conceived. Jordan was born April 1st. She has a certain amount of weight she wants to lose by one year after he was born... so I just shifted my date from March 15 to April 1st, and we decided we'd support each other in our weight loss journey.We made a pact, to not only support each other, but to get together at least once a week to exercise (at least for now)... and we've stuck to it.

I was so excited after we made the pact! We've always encouraged each other, but we've never done that. I didn't feel alone, so I decided to go for it. I began looking up stuff about PCOS and how to manage it.  I wanted to get a good diet, or at least tips.  I did find stuff, though not a lot I can entirely apply right now as far as that goes, but once thing I read was that exercise is even more important than diet* because the muscles helps convert the hormones or something like that.

So I was trying to exercise by myself and just eat a little healthier. I did see two separate people online talking about the 'couch to 5K' program. I thought that sounded cool, remembered about the prayer I'd said about a walk and thought if maybe God showed me a 5K, I'd jump on it and do that program.

I was especially gung ho because I knew I was going to the doctor soon. I have to talk to him about some issues I've been having, but I also am thinking I can for sure tell him I am active. I am trying to be healthier. And maybe he can put me on a medicine to help me manage my PCOS better. 

Then Hannah announced her 5K, that same week this all happened.

I was SO EXCITED. I just knew it was obvious God had placed the desire for a charity walk/run in my life, and then put the couch to 5K in front of me in time for this. I love seeing God's hands in stuff!

If it was just for Sadie Mae's memory alone, that'd be enough reason to do it, and I'd be doing it anyway. But it's also helping families struggling with this horrible struggle, and funding adoptions, which is close to my heart. So that's how I came to deciding to run.

I've never run at all in my life. I was always the slowest in my class in PE (my most hated class in school) and I am SO uncoordinated. But that's the fun of it! God is strong when we are weak. So this is going to be AWESOME!!!

"But He said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.' Therefore, I will most gladly boast all the more about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may reside in me. So because of Christ, I am pleased in weaknesses, in insults, in catastrophes, in persecutions, and in pressures. For when I am weak, then I am strong." -2 Corinthians 12:9-10

*for any readers who might have PCOS or be knowledgeable about it, I do know that diet is very important as well. I just happened to read articles that said exercise is even more important.

See Pam Run!!!

Okay, I am so excited to announce this!  I've told a few people in person, but this is my big launch.  I'm going to RUN a 5K! And not just any 5K, but one started by my dear friend Hannah and her husband in remembrance of their darling daughter Sadie Mae who lived January 18th.  I will ABSOLUTELY tell you more about the event, called the Field of Sunflowers Walk, a wonderful and worthy thing.

the mug I was drinking from as I go to post this has a sunflower on it. So I had to post it.

Sadie Mae had bi-lateral renal agensis, which she was diagnosed with at Hannah's 20 week ultrasound.When she and her husband TJ were anticipating the excitement of finding out if she was a boy or girl, they were intend told she would never live and had abortion recommended.  They chose to carry her term anyway, even though no baby with BRA has ever survived.  They did get to meet her, because she was born with her heart beating... but she never took a breath.  To read her story from the beginning on her mother's blog click here.

So Hannah and TJ are starting the Field of Sunflowers Walk/Run 5K! It will be September 10th in Woodruff, SC. They're raising money for the Carolina Perinatal Support Network, which according to their website "was established to provide a bridge of support for families experiencing an adverse prenatal diagnosis that will likely result in a preborn or newborn death.", and to help fund adoptions and  this will help launch their new nonprofit "Give a Life". Read all about it on the post Hannah wrote to announce it here.

You might be like 'what's the big deal? People do 5Ks everyday.' Yes, indeed! And I admit freely I'm no one special.  But a) this is a great cause and b) I'm over a hundred pounds overweight.  That does make this a bigger deal than it would be if I was a more normal weight, or at least makes it harder. And I was always that slow, uncoordinated, unathletic kid, even before I was overweight. For me, this is a big and daunting quest!  I mean, I could walk one now, no problem. But I can't run for more than a minute without wheezing. But I will!

"No discipline seems enjoyable at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it yields the fruit of peace and righteousness to those who have been trained by it. Therefore strengthen your tired hands and weakened knees, and make straight paths for your feet, so that what is lame may not be dislocated,but healed instead."-Hebrews 12:11-13  This verse has become my anthem in this area of my life. God is in this. I'll tell you about that later.

I've decided to announce first, then tell you how this all came about in more detail.  As you can see, I've started a new page on my website. For now, it'll basically be this post.  But each week, after this week, I'll do one weekly update about how it's doing on the blog, and I'll link to it on the page. This week I'm going to do a few more posts than that because I've going to tell you a) how this came about and b) what I've been doing so far. Because I've already started...

But I've been building up to starting the Couch to 5K program, which I'll be starting full out on Wednesday.  If any of you want to join me, we can start the same week and encourage each other!

Okay, I'm not actually running in this picture. But it sort of looks like I am, and I don't actually have any pictures of myself running yet, since I can't really take one myself, so shh! :)

People, I do want something from you.  Normally all I care about is that you read. But I need you. Please do at least one of these things:

1. Encourage me and spread the word!  You can do this by linking to the See Pam Run! page I've created or by going on facebook and liking the See Pam Run page I've created there (they wouldn't let me use an exclamation point!) and just spreading the word.  Invite all your friends! I just want people to know, to hear the story of Sadie Mae, and for local people to know so they can show up (or you could road trip in).  And because I'll need encouragement and if I know people want me to do this and not fail, then I won't. If I think it's just me, I may be tempted to give up if it gets hard.  But if you invite 550 people and only two like my page, that's okay!

2. Show up and walk or run yourself. I don't expect this from most of you, since my readers are spread all over the country and the world (so cool!) but if you're in South Carolina or the southeast, consider coming. Hannah is going to try to get businesses (or maybe individuals) to promise a certain amount (like a penny, or a dollar) for every person who crosses the finish line. So even if you don't do any personal fundraising, you can help by showing up and walking.

3. Donate or sponsor me. Because I am doing this for charity. But it's a worthy cause. I'm so broke, I feel guilty asking because I really, really know how tight the economy is. And spreading the word is enough for me... but please donate/sponsor me!  Even if it's just a dime.  Every penny counts! Right now, since it's months away, Hannah's just got a button for you to donate. Donate and either say you're doing it to sponsor me in the comments, or just donate without any comments because it's not really about me. And if you want to pledge to sponsor me but won't pay till later (like when I cross the finish line) then shoot me an email at singingpilgrimdancing@gmail.com and I'll get back to you later.

I love you guys!  I know I have a small following, but every one of you is amazing and I thank God for you!

(This money goes straight to Hannah and TJ, I have nothing to do with it. I just asked for the button!)

I need you.

Do you ever subconsciously type?

I talk to Ryan on facebook a lot. He gets on it at work. He's got an office job, and it's actually allowed so long as it doesn't get in the way of his work. And his job does NOT want him to leave, so he must be doing something right.

Anyway, because of that, we talk on facebook chat a lot.  And I find sometimes I subconsciously type.  I'll send something to him, and then look at something else while I wait for a reply- like a blog, or the tv, or something, and then I look back and first I read it and think 'he said that?' and then realize that I sent it.

This just happened. I had typed 'I need you'.  It was a thought, but I typed it to him. I've done this a few times before. I certainly don't do it everyday.  But something about typing has become so second nature to me now.  I was typing about how irritable and grouchy I was. I think I remember thinking 'maybe it's because I haven't talk to Ryan a lot today'... and apparently my subconscious told him 'I need you'.

Oh, brain. You are mysterious. But at least you were being truthful.

Breads, Berries, and Blooms

Another post celebrating the simple things.  In our house, fresh baked bread is getting pretty regular. The other day, however, Mom added a little too much yeast by mistake. So she was creative and turned the dough into rolls!

How the bread  is supposed to look

some of the rolls Mom made

Mom also made delicious muffins the other day: blueberry muffins made with homegrown blueberries!

our blueberry bush

some of the wild blackberries in our yard (plenty more to ripen!)

This year, for the first time, our yucca bloomed. We didn't plant the yuccas, they were here when we moved in. We've been living here almost 18 years and this is the first time they've bloomed. They're lovely!

And I also thought I'd show you our pink hydrangeas.  Okay, they're kind of wilting here. But I think it's neat it's pink. Normally they're blue or even purple.  My mom really wishes it was blue though. She says it has to do with acidity or base-ness of the soil or something? I don't know.

Okay, I'm off to workout (more on that later)...

Erika

So I recently reconnected with my old friend Erika.  She and I went to grade school together. We met in middle school when we were in a few clubs together.  We'd only seen each other once since I graduated (she was two years below me in school) when we went to the same concert on my twentieth birthday.

Erika, me, and David. It's really not a great picture of any of us, but we had just gotten out of the pool.  Look below for that story.

So we hung out this week, on Friday and on Sunday, and she said it was like we'd never been apart, as far as our friendship goes. I love that!  Also, she lives five minutes away from me! Well, for the summer.


Erika is a high school teacher. She rents and teaches elsewhere, but for the summer she's come home to her parent's house. And she's single. Which might sound silly, but the majority of my friends are now married, and quite a few have kids. And I love that, and I love their spouses and children, but it's nice to have friends who don't have to check with their spouses before we hang out. 

So we got together last Friday. We were going to go walking on the Cottonwood Trail, but instead went to the mall because it was just plain hot.  Then we went to my Bible Study together.

Once there, we found an impromptu pool party! I wanted to jump in right away, but they were about to eat dinner. All anybody had brought was salad, so Erika and I went out and got some pizzas. And while we did, Erika dashed into a sporting goods store and bought a tank top and shorts to swim in! I'd actually grabbed my swimsuit, because we'd talked about possibly swimming and I wanted to ready for all possibilities. But no one from Bible Study had said we'd swim, so that was new to me.

We came back and ate, and then changed into our suits.  Everyone at Bible Study had said we'd go poolside after dinner. So Erika, David, and I went into the pool and assumed everyone else was close behind...

They weren't.

So we played and waited... after forty-five minutes or so, Erika needed to go the bathroom, so we went inside and checked... they were holding Bible Study inside without us!

That kind of made us feel guilty, because it made it look like we'd chosen the pool over Bible Study, when in reality they had chosen inside over poolside. Also, we all love the Bible and wanted to fellowship and study together. But they were forty-five minutes in, plus the pool is so much more fun than a living room. So we went back out and Erika pulled up the Bible on her blackberry and we randomly selected a few verses and talked and discussed them. Then David, Erika and I hit the pool again!

Later, the other Bible Study people came out and Suzanne, who owns the pool and the house we meet in, climbed in and played with us.

Someday, I really hope that we actually do what we've talked about doing ever since Suzanne got the pool and have an actual Bible Study poolside. We've had just a get together on Friday night with grilling out and a pool party the first year, then the next year we were all set up to listen to a sermon while we either swam or lounged poolside but one member kiboshed that (sooo sad), and then this year half the Bible Study stayed inside without telling the other half!  (Please understand I'm saying this in my head in a happy voice, not a mad one.  I do honestly hope we someday have Bible Study poolside, so I can float and soak in the Word and wisdom at the same time, but I adore all the members of my Bible Study and I'm more teasing than anything.)

So Friday night we made plans to go to her church on Sunday. Which we did.

She goes to NewSpring, which is a megachurch. My only other experience with one was IHOP in Kansas City, which was an entirely different kind.  NewSpring has satellite campuses across the state, and we went to the Greenville one. The primary one is in Anderson. So the preacher was projected on a screen for the sermon! That was different... but I really liked it over all. I really liked the pastor, I felt he was very healthy spiritually in what he taught. They had a Christian rockband, which was very good.  Next week for Father's Day apparently all father's who go can enter to win a jet ski. Which is pretty cool.  Apparently Father's Day is the lowest church attendance Sunday of the year, so they're trying to battle that.

As I said, I had a good time, not just with NewSpring but also with Erika.  She may come to Bible Study again this Friday, and if so, this time we'll actually get together with the rest to study! She's got plans with a friend in the early afternoon though, and needs to make sure it's just for the early afternoon and will not be extending into the evening.

Athens Weekend

Yes, I’m still writing about last weekend this weekend. I’ve been so behind with my blog lately.  I told you about Ryan and Mallory’s wedding in Thursday’s post, which was the reason for the trip.  Lydia and I left from Spartanburg and went straight to the wedding… well, we’d worn clothes other than our wedding clothes on the way down so we stopped at an Ingles near the wedding and bought a hostess gift.

We had a great time at the wedding, and afterwards we drove to Athens (the wedding was a little outside the city in the countryside) and went to the house of the people we’d be staying with… however, they weren’t home yet. So we decided to hit downtown Athens.

Unfortunately, I hadn’t really thought about walking when I packed for the trip. So I’d just worn the one pair of dress shoes, which had started to hurt earlier in the evening at the wedding. Since it was Saturday night, in the summer, in Athens, the parking wasn’t exactly smack in the middle of downtown. So by the time we actually got to anything worth seeing, my feet were killing me.

We walked around and looked at shops. We went into one clothing shop and didn’t buy anything (but I really liked some of their jewelry, and Lydia saw shoes she wanted… but they didn’t have them in her size) and then continued to wander. Lydia said she wanted to eat something, but all her suggestions didn’t really excite me.  I was somewhat hungry (we’d eaten dinner a few hours earlier, and had danced liked crazy since) and didn’t want to walk a lot so I’d pulled out the GPS and was trying to find a very close restaurant we’d both like… which Lydia found hopelessly dorky. We decided to try to find one place… and didn’t succeed…

By this time we had wandered pretty far from the car, and we’d decided to just spend roughly an hour downtown and it was already half an hour. Then Lydia confessed she wasn’t like meal hungry, and that frozen yogurt would do… which sounded great to me, because I really didn’t feel like eating real food either. We’d passed a Yoguri earlier in our wanderings, somewhat close to the car, so we headed that way.

The guy behind the counter was a hoot.  We split a pistachio/taro swirl (I’d never even heard of taro) and liked it so much we wanted another! Lydia added something to the second one… and for the life of me I can’t remember what they’re called. But as the guy described, they taste somewhat like a mix between marshmellows and gummy bears. They were okay, but I thought the frozen yogurt was better without them.

Because Lydia thought the way the guy had put the whatever-they’re-called on the dish looked like art, we took a picture of the frozen yogurt. Yes, we did. Yes, we’re dorks.

After we finished our second frozen yogurt, we headed out… and my feet were screaming at me.  So I took off my shoes and carried them. This made Lydia exorbitantly happy, because apparently in a previous year she’d done the same thing, so she claims now we have that special bond of walking downtown Athens barefoot.

When we got back to the car we went back to our hostesses house, where I met them. They’re members of the same church Lydia belongs to, only in Athens. I’ve visited the church in Athens before, and I think I’d met one of them. I know I’d met her sister and brother.  We all talked, and then one of the two went to bed and Lydia, our awake hostess, and I stayed up pretty late talking and bonding. I like her a lot. It’s so wonderful to bond with brethren in Christ.

After we went to bed, I stayed up because I missed Ryan like crazy. I facebooked him and he didn’t come online like he normally does. I hadn’t really done the math though, and he was in church. Duh! So by the time he finally came online, I was about to fall over. So I talked to him on facebook for about two minutes, then crawled under the covers.

On Sunday we got up and our hostess made us French toast with strawberries in sauce and powdered sugar. Yum!  Sooo good. 

Then we all went to church. I love that style of worship so much! You come in and everyone is already singing hymns (they start pretty much whenever the first person arrives). We all sit in a circle (well a square) around the table the communion will be served on.  If you want to sing a particular hymn, you just call it out! I admit I’m not so keen on the fact that after you finish singing, people talk the words of the hymns… but that’s because I love to sing so much I’d rather just sing and sing and sing! But they repeat the words, emphasizing good truths, and it does help it sink in.  And I think it helps those who don’t enjoy singing enjoy the hymns.

waterfall style fountain in front of the church in Athens

Then we do communion, which is passed-around-with-tiny-cups style.  Then, depending on the church you either start the lesson or you sing some more. We sang some more, then broke and visited a little, then started the lesson. There is no sermon or pastor, though elders lead and guide the whole service, and make announcements if needed. Instead, they learn from a book of devotionals (chock full of the Bible) the whole church has been individually worshipping with each day during the week… OR occasionally, but rarely, they open the floor to whatever God’s been speaking to you that week, regardless of if it fits into the daily devotional. I LOVE that style, it is ALWAYS good, the devotional one is sometimes good sometimes only so-so, but never bad (I’m pulling from many experiences at churches of this style I’ve visited in… five different cities. There isn't one in Spartanburg).  

ceiling at church in Athens

Then at Athens, we stayed and watched a fifteen minute film sent by the national church organization, which was somewhat interesting. Also, excitingly, Athens is sending off one of their members to France to serve with the church there! Today would be her last Sunday, last week was her second to last.

fireplace in church in Athens

Anyway, it’s very different from most, but it’s a healthy vibrant church and I love it. It was terrific.

An older couple at the church invited Lydia and I to lunch with them, then when they found out who our hostesses were, they invited them too.  We had baked spaghetti with garlic bread and salad, then a brownie with ice cream for dessert. Again, delicious! It was really a great food weekend.

We hung around and visited, and Lydia played with the grandkids who were visiting the couple. Then we headed back to Spartanburg. On the way, Tabitha texted, and that adventure was told about in my post on .

Overall, it was a great weekend, and I loved it. I love weddings. I love Christiand and the church. I love friends, both old and new. And I love adventure. Yay! (Though talking to Ryan more would have definitely made it better, I'll give you that!)