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Friday, January 6, 2012

Book Review: Real Marriage by Mark & Grace Driscoll

The full title is Real Marriage: The Truth About Sex, Friendship, & Life Together, written by the famous pastoral couple Mark and Grace Driscoll. They tell the story of their marriage, go into the differences between men and women, talk about sexual intimacy, and apply the Bible throughout.They dive into the hard subjects of past abuse, secrets, and just plain selfishness. They did a good job of delving into the subject in the way they set out to accomplish.

I enjoyed the book and found some of it quite interesting and fascinating, but I also though the Driscolls wrote from the perspective of their particular brand of Christianity. I found I agreed with most everything in essence, just not always in presentation.  I found myself swinging between fascination, agreement, and emotionally responding.

One fun thing I did was discuss this book with my own future husband-to-be, who himself is a huge Mark Driscoll fan.  It was a lot of fun, and enlightening.

One thing I wasn't that huge a fan of was the last chapter on "Reverse Engineering" your marriage. For one, it seemed almost like it was just thrown on to the end of the book. I also just disagreed with it. Minutely planning each detail of your future seems to put the emphasis on a Self directed life, not a God directed one. I believe we should let Christ plan our lives, as His ways are higher than ours. I think preparing for your future is absolutely critical and Biblical, that is, opening your mind and heart to possibilities and readying yourself for quick action should God call you to it. However, action should always be God directed.  We have to let go of our own plans and trust God for the future, otherwise we're not living up to the full potential of a God-lead life. This chapter could be used to envision a future; but we should always be prepared to throw that vision away if God seems to call us to something else. Many a 'disaster' has been for His children's own good. This is a very, very strong message I've personally gotten from the Lord in my own life; the Driscolls may have gotten different advice. God leads his children individually and intimately.

I got this book free from the publishers in exchange for my unbiased review.

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