Oh, what did I do this week to prepare for India?
Well, I threw some stuff out. I made important phone calls. Ryan met with his pastor and talked, amongst other things, about us.
Most of my preparation has been internal. I cried earlier this week about some of the things I'll miss out on. I didn't really have anyone to talk to, because I knew if I talked to my mom she'd try to convince me that I should stay in the US, and when I tried to talk to Ryan he began soothing me and telling me about how we could modify our plans to ease things. But I don't want either option. I'm sure what we're doing is the right thing. I have no regrets about moving to India. But I will mourn some of things I will miss out on, or just miss. I will, and it's healthy.
With every choice we make, there is a choice we didn't' make, or maybe dozens. And it is okay to mourn the path not taken without that meaning you made a mistake. I'm just mourning what might have been; it doesn't diminish the awesomeness of what is or will be.
Does that make sense? Ryan is too upset by me being upset about anything to get it, and my mom has her own agenda, so I guess this burden is between me and God. He can bear it, He's willing to help. And He knows what lies ahead for me, even though I don't, and He knows it's worth it.
I meant to start a list this week. See, I had been thinking, "What can I get rid of?" But I realized the more important question was "What are you definitely taking with you?" And so I've been meaning to sit down and start that list and haven't yet... but I guess I will now.
- hug sweater (this big oversized sweater that makes me feel all warm and cozy everytime I put it on, like someone is giving me a hug.)
- tapestries (I have three I collected for my "someday" house)
- the "India" candle holder (a friend at Bible Study brought this for me when I announced to them I was going to move, so I will keep it to remember her and Bible Study)
- the book collection (I've been amassing a collection specifically to take to India. This doesn't include all my books by half, but it's pretty much all my Christian books, including pretty much all the books I've reviewed here.)
- my camera (of course: I primarily asked for it for the move)
- my netbook (of course)
- my laptop (which is broken, but Ryan will fix I hope.)
- my Nook (again, of course. I again primarily asked for it for the move, so I can continue to review books in India where most publishers won't ship)
- assorted jewelry (I'll need to make a more specific list in the future)
That's what I got right now. Maybe I'll add a few things each week, to help me ultimately make a packing list. There's lots of other 'definitely takes' but I decided it had to be stuff I knew where they were right now, and also I didn't want to bore you with too much stuff.
I also took Sophie to the vet this week. While this is something that was necessary because of her health, in a way it's part of the preparation because Ryan and I plan on flying Sophie over with me. She's coming to India too! So she needs to be healthy for that. It touched my heart that Ryan was concerned for her too. He used to complain I was too affectionate with Sophie, and still does (he's afraid I spoil her terribly), but he loves her too, even though he's never met her. That makes me happy.