Monday, September 2, 2013

A Date with My Husband

It was a blessing to go on a date with my husband yesterday.

My Non-24 sleep disorder reared its head and Ryan was just on a sleep during the day schedule from
not from yesterday, just a different time we were at a different
the fact he was working a night schedule this past week, so we slept in until 5:30pm. We woke up feeling refreshed and in love, as in the middle of our sleep Ryan had tugged some blanket away from me and I woke up saying I was cold. So he wrapped his arms around me and we fell asleep cuddling.

We checked movie times when we got up because we had decided we were going on a date. But there was no movie showing we were interested in seeing. So we decided to go out and have dinner, and then come back and watch something together at home.

We went to a restaurant we hadn't been to before which had a very varied menu. I tried lasagna for the first time since leaving America.... I'm not sure I could really call it lasagna in a classical way. It was actually tasty. But it was 50% vegetables (peas and such) with very, very thin flat pieces of pasta and the cheese was I think maybe what's in cheese slices in the layers and on top was a cheese that was primarily liquid and pure white. No ricotta or mozerella in sight, and I couldn't really detect any tomato sauce... there was a slight yellowness to the whole thing that I knew was from tomato sauce but one sad thing about India is they don't' have any appreciation for generous portions of tomato sauces.  As I told Ryan, lasagna should at least be orange, if not red, not yellow.

But despite how strange it sounds, it was actually good. Just not really what I'd think of as lasagna. Ryan tasted it and wanted to keep eating it (he'd ordered himself a club sandwich) but I shooed him away with the wave of a fork. I told him if he liked this he should try real lasagna (he can't ever remember having it.)

We also had bubble teas, four between us. I had blueberry and watermelon and Ryan had mango and I think taro?

Then we did some grocery shopping... oh, before that we did window shopping, and then headed home.

We watched a movie and then two documentaries. And we talked.

We shared our minds.

Me, during the dating phase, looking in the
camera and thinking about Ryan.
Remember, for us especially, talking laid the foundation for our relationship. We were 8,000 miles apart for around two and a half years. All we had was words.

And now we primarily discuss plans and methods of house cleaning and transportation and schedules and other practical stuff that comes with being married and having your own apartment.

But I miss just talking to him, about the big stuff, the small stuff, the future stuff, the past stuff, the everything.

Did you know that right around when we first started dating he was off work for a few weeks and I was unemployed, so we would talk seven hours a day? Sometimes nine... sometimes a mere five...

We knew that the internet program he used to talk to me (I'd call a number with my phone and it'd ring his computer) would cut off a call at exactly three hours. We know because it happened. A lot. So we'd have to call each other back and talk for another three hours, of course.

Even after he was working full time, we talked three to four hours.

Eventually we'd talk twenty minutes to two hours a weekday, and two to four hours on the weekends.

But we still talked.

And it's not that we don't talk now... but we don't have real conversations every day. By real, I mean about more than paperwork or dishes. About something that comes from within. About God. About future children. About dreams for the future. About fears and insecurities.

But Sunday, we talked. And we talked. When we watched documentaries, we shared our minds discussing what was brought up. We kisses. We both turned to each other after the other one was talking and said, "I love you."

Then Ryan tried to send me to bed and watch UFC on his own.


He's not perfect. He kind of messed up the ending that way.

But he's mine, and I love him and I wouldn't want anyone else.


  1. Hi! I just found your blog at and it is so interesting! My husband and I moved to India about two months ago because God told us to. So, I already feel we have a few things in common. I subscribed to your feed, looking forward to reading more.

  2. Hello Pamela -- so glad you and hubby had a chance to get out and just enjoy each other. So very important! Thanks for sharing your thoughts. And BTW...LOVE your name. It was my girl's name three times around! Visiting from Living Proverbs 31. Blessings...PS my husband and I had a courtship of words, too, words written over 47 days!!

  3. Haha! I was reading along and thinking Ryan sounded toooo perfect and then he sent you to bed! :)
    Makes me smile. I often say this about Jason: "He's not perfect, but he's perfect for me". I'm thinking you could say the same.


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