After my last update, I definitely wasn't sure. Friday I felt weird and different. Up until then even though the doctor had told me that I was dilating and my body seemed pretty ready I wasn't really feeling much different. Yes, I felt the contractions but most were painless and the ones that weren't were totally mild and not that much different then getting a small ache or pain that just goes along with being extremely pregnant.
But Friday I felt the toll of having had contractions for days. I was wiped out. I also couldn't really sleep. I would wake easily. I had nightmares. One where my mom died, another where I was chased by monsters. Both happened pretty much as soon as I fell asleep so that when I woke up in terror I'd only gotten an hour or less sleep. I was pooped. I did try the hot water shower
Saturday I had my "bloody show". Sharing this with "btdt" moms (been-there-done-that) I heard lots of stories of women having babies after that anywhere from 9 hours later to 3 days, but generally it was agreed it was a sign labor was pretty imminent. I had been shocked last Wednesday when the doctor had told me that, but I think Saturday was when it really started to be processed and I was getting comfortable with the idea. It didn't hurt that Ryan and I ordered the last of the stuff we needed for the baby's arrival (besides a few stuff we could get at a local pharmacy.) Oh, Saturday I had another interesting dream. It wasn't really a nightmare, but it wasn't really a "feel good" dream either. I dreamt that I woke up and the baby's head was already out! I'd labored in my sleep! The baby cried and woke up Ryan and we pulled the baby onto my chest. She was HUGE. Yes, it was a girl. Ryan was getting all emotional and gushing about it being a girl and while I was appreciating that and cradling her I was also very aware of her umbilical cord and telling Ryan, "Yes, yes, she's a girl. CALL AN AMBULANCE cause I don't think you know how to deliver a placenta." Hahaha. After I woke up I teased myself thinking "well that's wishful thinking, Pam, that you could sleep through the worst part of labor."
Ryan had, however, gotten my ire up in that you guys know I'd gotten off of bed rest at 36 weeks... but I still really hadn't gotten to go out. I had gotten to go to meet with my brothers and sisters in Christ and I'd gone on a celebratory walk in my new neighborhood. But otherwise I hadn't gotten to get out. Mainly this was Ryan's fear. Even though the doctor was like go for it, he actually said to me "Act like you're still on bed rest so that the baby doesn't come." Sigh. I told him point blank LAST weekend that I had wanted to go on a date. He had said, sure, sure, sure but hadn't done it. Then I wanted to do it Saturday morning... he said we'll do it Saturday afternoon... then said he was too tired and took a nap... then Saturday night I was too tired. So he PROMISED we'd do it Sunday.
We went out around brunch time and I'm going to do a post on our date alone. :) It was fun. We were only out like an hour and a half though because in the middle of our meal Ryan gets a call from his boss. He'd been scheduled to have Saturday and Sunday off... but apparently it was a mistake! His entire team at work was supposed to be schedule to work on Sunday, it was a SNAFU by the company. So his boss was desperately calling him back in. We didn't rush our meal and finished it up, but we'd had plans for the rest of the Sunday that got put on hold.
As we were leaving I had a really painful contraction for the first time. Well, I say really painful in a relative way. I know that they will get way, way worse. But it was like I can't walk and I have to breathe contraction, where as all the ones I'd had previously I could basically function normally through, except maybe a grimace. I told Ryan when he left for work that I thought he'd be starting paternity leave the next day. He was shocked and was like "no, no, no, no!" He wasn't ready. He ordered me to take it easy the rest of the day. I laughed at him and told him I needed to get stuff ready. Like I had some baby stuff to get ready. But I compromised and told him that I'd stick to baby stuff only and not do like dishes or laundry. (No problem with that. ;) )
A few hours after he left I ate some watermelon and was drinking water and suddenly BAM I felt myself breaking out into a sweat and feeling like I needed to throw up... I went to the bathroom and, well, I did! This was out of NOWHERE and extremely out of character in that even during my weeks and weeks of morning sickness I only threw up one day: the day after Thanksgiving. Where it was obvious that I'd had too many rich foods. I don't throw up easily. So I googled it and yes, throwing up in early labor generally means the body is clearing itself out for labor. Yay! So I really thought I was probably hours away from active labor...
But obviously I wasn't. Sunday around 6 pm my contractions basically stopped for an hour and a half and when they started back up they were back to like 20-30 minutes apart and felt mild again. (They had been 8-15 minutes apart.)
Sunday-into-Monday night I fell asleep... and slept and slept and slept. I got up a few times to pee and such like any pregnant woman but I probably slept 11 hours. I had another interesting dream. This time we had two babies... that is, apparently we'd tried to have a baby via surrogate and then weeks later had gotten pregnant. So our surrogate baby was born. He was a boy and we gave him the name we'd picked out for this baby if it's a boy, so we were talking about how when this baby came we'd find out if we would have two boys or a boy and a girl. The poor surrogate baby though, apparently I had forgotten he existed (since he doesn't) so he didn't get fed for three days! But he was okay. Somehow. We were getting close enough to this baby being born I was starting to breastfeed him, kind of hoping it'd trigger the other baby to arrive, and hoping I'd be able to get enough supply when this baby came I could nurse them both. Dreams are weird.
I woke up feeling a lot better... but barely having any contractions. Well I was up for 40 minutes before I had one... then the next one was 36 minutes later... then the next one was 28 minutes later... then the next was only 13 minutes later. They stayed around there and didn't progress. I was awake for some hours and Ryan and I went out to get stuff from the pharmacy and had dinner with his parents. Then we came home and played video games until I was ready to drop. I think I was awake for only 6 hours? But I was wiped out again! I thought well I guess maybe my body was storing up energy before active labor kicked in? I hoped?
Yes, I hoped. Somewhere on Sunday to Monday I went from adjusting to the idea that this baby was coming to wanting this baby to come. Even in the mild stage, early labor is exhausting. I figure active labor will suck but that it will suck regardless of whether it happens today or next week. But this early labor will be cut down less if I have it today! And also, I want to meet my baby!
Ryan's still wanting the baby to stay in until at least this weekend. And I'm not really at "GET THIS BABY OUT." I'm just like "eh, this early labor is tiring and getting old. Come on baby, let's get you out." So if baby doesn't listen and decides to please Dad instead, well, it'll be okay. And my body is showing signs that this is progressing, so it probably won't be that much longer. Ryan is really wanting it to get to this weekend because he gets his paycheck Saturday. Of course, the hospital stay should be about 48 hours and he'd be paying the bill when we leave. So we could leave Saturday, right? So I guess if I go into labor say Thursday night that'd make us both happy? Hahahaha... we'll see what baby decides...